Hubby's first exam went wonderfully this morning so now we're just waiting for Thursday to be done with the rest of the term. J did have one accident today but potty training is still going well and once is not bad for sure. E rolled over from her back to belly last week and since has been enjoying tummy time a lot more which has been exciting for C and J to get down on the floor with her as she attempts to scoot towards them. C and J both have been working on their writing. J is getting more control with drawing and has done a few letters. C can write most letters but is still getting them down (practice makes perfect) and today she wrote her numbers as well. I know they both will just need practice to get better about it and it's just one more sign they're getting bigger so quickly. I hope to start more seriously on teaching reading with C after Christmas and I'm hoping J's interest will spark from seeing the lessons with big sis. We'll see. I'm not sure if we'll be putting C in school next year or not since it will depend on where we are based on hubby's job, but right now I love that I can teach the kids at home and we have this time together.
FOR PARENTS
The following is a realization I've had on my mind recently that I'm writing to share and as a reminder to me in the coming years. I know this is not perfect but it's something I believe in and feel other parents may be able to relate to if we really think about it.
I realized that no matter how you parent, if you work or stay at home, if you home school or send to public school, if you're older or younger, if you have one child or ten, use cloth diapers or disposables, etc. etc., as long as you educate yourself, make each decision based on what is best for your family, put your children's needs first, and make the most of the situation you're in, you are a good parent. This has taken me three years to really admit and completely understand though it seems simple enough. It's hard as parents to accept that doing the best for us is not necessarily doing the same thing as everyone else.
Of all my friends and family members who are parents, though I agree more with some people's ways of parenting than others, none of us do everything exactly the same and I think in the end whether we agree or not, as long as we put our children first and educate ourselves in making each decision for our kids we're all doing a good job raising our children. And though we don't always agree I think we can agree on the following things we must do as parents.
We must be open to criticism at times and be able to back up what we're doing and what we choose not to do as well as admit when we're wrong. If you don't open yourself to others' ideas you'll never learn and never become better. This doesn't mean you have to agree with every new idea from a fellow parent but you must be open and research I think. I have learned so much from my friends who are parents though I haven't done everything they've recommended.
You must be humble and always always willing to learn and admit you don't know everything. The best parents I've met even though they had several years and/or many children under their parental experience belt have all told me they still don't know everything. You're constantly learning with kids even when they're no longer under your roof. And it's when you think you're most in control that you're proven wrong. If you think you know everything how do you learn anything new? No one's perfect so just be the best you can be at this moment and strive to become better and learn from every challenge. Always make the most of each new day.
You must be adaptable. Every child is different and what works for your first may not work for your second, what works for your friend may not work for you and so on. Also what works today may not work tomorrow. If one thing doesn't work try something else till you find what fits. Once again this is the nature of children, each one is unique and they're constantly growing and changing.
And finally, remember "the grass is always greener on the other side"...well at least it seems to be. We always want what we don't have and when looking at other people's lives we're looking through rose colored glasses. Everyone has challenges they face. Everyone has good days and bad. We usually see people's good days more often when it comes to parenting. I mean honestly no one is posting the pictures of the child crying or the mom pulling her hair out, or the close ups of spit up stains, poop explosions, and bags under parent's eyes on facebook.
I know I've envied parents who seem to always have it all together and recently I realized they don't after all. They're not better than us because they do more or worse because they seem to do less. We're not living their lives each hour and we're not seeing the whole picture and they're not seeing ours. We're all learning as we go, making the best of our situations, and being the best parents possible to our children. No parents are the same but many people with very different parents still have wonderful childhoods and still end up being successful healthy adults with families of their own. My mother didn't have the opportunity to stay home with me but she still is the most amazing mother in the world. I still learned more from her than the fancy boarding school I attended and every parenting book I've read (and there's a lot of them lol). She made the most of what we had, the time, the place we lived, and every other part of our lives.
Don't look at the parents on tv, your neighbors, or even your relatives to see if you're being the best parent possible. All you need to do is look at your children. It is written in every smile, hug, kiss, and even each tear they shed that is so quickly resolved when comforted by Mommy and Daddy. I know I'm not perfect and I will face more challenges in the years to come but I also know looking at my children, even though I'm not doing all I wish I could at all times, I'm doing right by them and I am a good parent. I hope everyone who reads this can look at their little ones and know the same :)
And here's some pictures I took of my three perfect blessings today. Looking at these reminds me how much I love them, how amazing and unique they each are, and that I am constantly striving to be the best mom I can be, for them :)
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